Hen Pecked

Last week, a woman came into the college health center where I work. She had two black eyes, and was there to see if her nose was broken. The other nurse who checked her in, asked her how it happened.

Apparently, this woman raises chickens. She let her dog outside to use the bathroom, not knowing one of the chickens was out. She grabbed the chicken to protect it from the dog. This angered the rooster.

Picture this: She's holding the chicken in her arms. The chicken is freaking out because the dog is barking and jumping at her. The the rooster comes along and flies at her. It is a mess of feathers, and feet, and teeth, and beaks. The rooster kicked her in the chin, and then pecked her on the nose, causing the black eyes!!!

Watch out for this guy!

My mom can relate all too well. When she was a kid living in Idaho, it was her job to go collect the eggs from the hen house. They also had a really mean rooster. My eight-year-old mom used to put on her dad's huge army jacket and boots to go collect the eggs, because their rooster would jump on her back and attack her!



Army fatigues, not just for combat



To Sleep, Perchance to Dream

Part of my job as an RN at the college health clinic where I work is to answer phone calls from patients inquiring about medical issues, and offer professional advice. This is definately not one of my favorite aspects of my job.

Many of our students are international students from other countries. Sometimes they don't speak very good English, or have very thick accents. It can be sometimes be difficult to determine what they are saying when speaking with them face to face. Understanding them over the phone is even more difficult.

Recently, I received a call from one such student*. He first asked me if there was a male he could speak with, as he was having a "male problem." I informed him that none of our male doctors were in that day, but that I was a nurse, and maybe I could help him.

In his broken English, he went on to tell me that each morning he wakes up around 5:00 a.m. and gets up to use the bathroom. He then goes back to sleep. In my head, I already knew where this was going.

Sure enough, he then went on to tell me that he has dreams, "sexual dreams", and that he ejaculates.

I asked him how old he was, (beyond puberty). I also asked him if it had ever happened before (no). Then I assured him that this is completely normal, and in fact very common among adolescent males. I told him that there was no treatment for this, though it can be annoying. I informed him that he was welcome to make an appointment with one of the male doctors to discuss it with them and see if they had any advice to offer.

I never know WHAT kind of call I'm going to get next!

I am not violating HIPAA by sharing this story, as is has been de-identified. ttp://privacyruleandresearch.nih.gov/pr_08.asp#8a

Clever, clever, Toilet Lever

I work as a Registered Nurse for a college health center. Much of what we do is promote safer sex practices. We also offer STD and HIV testing. Because of the atmosphere of the population we serve, it's a really easygoing place to work. We always have a plethora of free goodies at the front desk:


Free condoms!...check out what the insert says.

 

Here are some of our promo posters hanging around the clinic:

One of my favorites is this one:

Clever, no?

I get to wear a button on my ID badge that says:



Tee-hee hee

 We do offer a lot more than just sexual health care. I LOVE this poster:

Buck Up, Buttercup!

I work as a nurse in a Student Health Clinic. Part of my job involves giving immunization shots to the college students, whether it's a flu shot, or a tetanus shot. I came across the above pamplet in my clinic, and the expression on the guy's face really tickles my funny bone. You'd be surprised how many of the adults I give shots to actually make this face BEFORE I even give the shot.

AFTER the shot is over, they're usually quite surprised. They make comments like, "That was IT?", "Did you already do it?", "That wasn't bad at all!" and "I didn't even feel that!".....Damn, I'm good at my job. :)

Buck Up, Buttercup!