Where would I be?

A few months ago, my mother-in-law mentioned to me that her nephew's newlywed wife had been living in California to pursue her acting career. Apparently she had been filmed as an Extra in a movie. I'm pretty sure my MIL was just trying to make conversation, but this statement really got me thinking.

Part of me felt smug, like, "Does she really think she can make it in L.A.?" and "Doesn't she know if she takes too many Extra parts, that's all they'll ever see her as?"

But then I felt angry, and jealous. Her husband obviously believed in her enough, that he supported her decision to try and make it in L.A. I distinctly remember a conversation I had with Mr. Wright early in our marriage, when I told him I wanted to be a Theatre major. His reply was, "Well, yeah, but what are you going to DO with that? Acting doesn't make any money!"

At the time, it really hurt my feelings. I felt he only cared about money, and didn't think pursing a Theatre degree was worthwhile. Ever the realist, Mr. Wright brought me back down to Earth. But should he have? Is it our responsibility to plant our loved ones firmly in reality, or should we encourage them to fly?

In many ways, Mr. Wright is my biggest fan, and my biggest support. But there have definitely been times when I have felt that he merely tolerates my talents as "hobbies". I have always felt that I could only pursue singing and acting as long as I did them on the side, and also had a career to fall back on.

I couldn't help but think, "Where would I be right now, if Mr. Wright had encouraged me, and believed in me more?"

There was a time when he made a comment about my singing that devestated me, and shook my confidence for months. He insists that he did not mean it the way I took it. Still, how often do we say things without realizing how damaging they can be to our loved ones? We should be each other's biggest cheerleaders when it comes to our dreams.

How far could I have gone, if Mr. Wright had said, "I can get a job in sales anywhere. Why don't we move to L.A. or New York, and really give this thing a shot?" I have no way of knowing if I would have been good enough to "make it", but I was never really given the chance to try!

Do I blame my lack of fame and fortune on Mr. Wright? No! But do I wonder what opportunities I could have had with a little more encouragement.