Love Thyself

Ladies, when it comes to Valentine's Day, I say it is time to take your power back! Valentine's Day is supposed to be about love, and what greater love can you celebrate than to love YOURSELF?

Single on Valentine's Day? GREAT! No need to mope around the house, lamenting the fact that you don't have a sweetheart! Do something nice for yourself, like getting a pedicure, or a massage. Treat yourself to your favorite dinner or dessert. Buy that new purse you've had your eye on. Choose to love YOURSELF on Valentine's Day.

The same goes for ladies who DO have a sweetheart. Have enough love in your heart to give selflessly. Don't let his shortcomings get to you . You can CHOOSE to be happy on Valentine's Day, no matter what he does or doesn't do.

Quit moping about, secretly resenting your sweetheart, wishing he would send you flowers. Have something delivered to HIM. Who says it's the GUY who has to do all the Valentine's Day planning? Arrange for a babysitter, make dinner reservations, and plan a fun activity. Buy him a card, give him a gift, and a little token to show your love.

I wasted SOOO many Valentine's Days feeling disappointed. I always expected my husband to do all the planning, hoped for flowers, cards, and gifts. Inevitably, Valentine's morning, he would NOT have a card or present for me. He would say, "Oh, I thought we were doing that later!" (It was apparent he had procrastinated.) Valentine's night, he would not have arranged for a babysitter. So with Spitfire in tow, we would drive around from restaurant to restaurant, trying to find a place to eat, because he hadn't made a reservation. Meanwhile, I would be fuming inside.

This year, I decided I would practice loving myself on Valentine's Day. That meant that I would not allow a stupid day to validate my worth as a person, or the depth of my relationship. I decided not to put any expectations on him for Valentine's Day. I decided that my love for myself would be enough, and that if Valentine's Day was important to ME to show love, then I should do it.

I decided that if I wanted to do something on Valentine's night, I should be the one to plan it. I also decided that I should be the one to have something delivered to HIM, so I had an Edible Arrangements fruit bouquet delivered to his work. He was SO surprised and LOVED it!

This year, I gave of myself, and didn't expect anything in return from Mr. Wright. In the morning when we woke up, I gave him his Valentine's cards, one from me, and one from the kids. Inside were gift certificates to Nordstrom, and Lowes. True to form, Valentine's morning as I gave him his cards and presents, he said, "Oh, I thought we were doing that later tonight."

In previous years, this would have really upset me. But I didn't let it bother me this year, because I love myself, and I love him. I wasn't expecting a grand show of affection from him. He doesn't have to prove anything to me on Valentine's Day, because he shows me he loves me every day, by making dinner and doing the dishes. He washes Sunshine's laundry, takes out the garbage, and takes care of the kids while I do my various activities.

Boy was I surprised when he showed up at my work with Sunshine, and brought me sushi for lunch, Vanilla Coke, a card with a gift card to Barnes and Noble, Hershey's Air Delight Kisses, a gift certificate to the Spa Club, and these:

It was a very pleasant surprise. :) Sometimes when you learn to let go, people can surprise you.

I had a fun activity planned in the evening for our whole family to Boondocks Fun Center. (We ended up not doing this. We had to take Spitfire to the doctor because she was coughing every 10 seconds, and gagging. We fixed dinner at home instead.)

It ended up being one of the best Valentine's Days I can remember. I am so glad I changed my attitude!